Author: L. Treviño

Valley Limons

My dad was a postman. Growing up as a kid of a postman gives one a unique appreciation for the awesome capabilities of a daily home delivery service that just seems like it has always been there. Through rain, sleet and snow… Lest I spiral off into a tangent, let’s get back to the matter at hand. The post office?  No — Valley Limons! Now I don’t know if Valley Limons are actually “a thing,” but they are as real as Khaleesi’s dragons in my home.  In short, it’s my dad. He’s got a knack for all things green and animal kingdom.  So it is he who impressed upon me the wonders of the not so elusive, but nevertheless hard-to-find Valley Limon: a unique hybrid of lemons and limes cultivated in the melting pot that is South Texas. Cool! Then, he spoke of the contraband seedling he hauled all the way from the Valley  up to San Antonio and planted in his own yard. Fugitive Valley Limon.  Double cool! Now, we can behold the Valley …

The Perfect…Laptop Sleeve

Getting a new laptop is a big deal.  Almost certainly, you are replacing a much used, beloved  device that has – in my case, at least – weathered many bumps, scratches and near-miss coffee catastrophes. And those are just the external dangers! My laptop has hobbled on its last legs for a while now, slowly losing functionality.  Random keyboard tiles stopped working, the CD/DVD player rejected all manner of content, and, then, the final death knell came: OS upgrades were not compatible. Ouch. So, the new laptop arrived in all its shiny, fully-functional glory! Hooray!! Then the next question immediately came: What am I going to carry this thing in? I knew I didn’t want to go the whole laptop bag route.  Been there, done that.  I wanted a sleeve. So I had drilled down my shopping focus. Win. I promptly took to an online shopping search.  I hit my usual spots. The requirements? Something streamlined. Something functional. Something with that indescribable X factor. Found it. (And it didn’t even take that long.  Whew!) Herschel …

Mother Tongue Tied

I don’t speak Spanish. There, I said it.  It’s out there. Done. Sure, I can say my last name with the requisite rolling ‘r’s, but that seems only to confuse the issue.  Rolling the shit outta that ‘r’ when I introduce myself by full name causes Latinos and non-Latinos alike to assume I’m a fluent Spanish speaker. I am not. Once my ‘secret’ is out, I experience something akin to the (insert number here) stage of grief: shock, incredulity, disappointment or (my favorite) pity. ¡Pobresita! In recent years, my tolerance for this reaction has lowered. So much so that I’ve taken the affirmative step to do something about it. I am the proud (and slightly apprehensive) owner of Rosetta Stone’s Spanish, Levels 1-5. Woo-hoo (Blur-style)!! Will it work? No, I mean, will it really work?  Will I be speaking in rapid-fire (ahem, fuego rapido) fluency by the time I get through Level 5?  The commercials I’ve seen for the past ten years tell me so.  Now, I’m ready to believe it. We shall see. Cards …